This is something many people in my community talk about … whether it’s sharing/marketing their business in a way that feels aligned with their ethics, being told how often they have to post on social media or send emails, or how they’re meant to write every day if they really want to be a “writer”.

The implied message is that if you follow a certain formula, you’ll have success … and if you don’t, you won’t.

Under THAT is the sense that if you don’t do what the experts say, you’re an outlier or not following sound advice, which is translated into: perhaps you’re not motivated enough … or you’re self-sabotaging … or you’re too sensitive … or you’re not grounded/practical enough. 

While much of the advice experts/coaches, etc. share is often sound and can work for many people, those people usually are neurotypical and/or non-HSPs.

When you have a highly attuned nervous system, you are deeply compelled to do things in a way that won’t burn you out or don’t feel inauthentic to who you are. 

…That’s because you know what it takes to recover from burnout (since you’ve probably been burned out many times before, thus recycling the story that there’s something ‘wrong’ with you because you’re not like other people: you actually burnout!) and how your entire body feels icky when you follow a rule that literally jars against every part of who you are.

I just want you to know you don’t have to follow all the so-called rules. 

There are ways to connect with your community—and your creative spirit—that feel genuine and sustainable. For YOU.

You get to make your rules. 

You get to become curious about what will support you to express your true self—when and how you need. 

You can lean on your bones.

Really feel the strength of yourself … in your body that carries that beautiful, sensitive nervous system … honoring all of who you are. 

When you do, you can show up for your community in a way that feels real, genuine, and honest. 

Your community won’t quit on you if you don’t send 3 emails a week. 

Or post daily on social media in a highly curated way.

Or pay someone thousands of dollars each month to run Facebook ads.

Or grow a list of 10k, 50k, 100k, 500k, or more.

Or market based on ‘pain points.’

Your talent won’t dry up if you don’t do morning pages or wake up at 4am to write.

Of course, if that works for you, do it!

But you’ll still know how to pick up your pen or place your fingertips gently on the keyboard at 5pm, 12am, tomorrow, and next week.

It’s OK to wait. It’s OK to listen. It’s OK to share what feels true, instead of pushing yourself hard to create content when it’s actually hurting you, just because you’re told that’s what you’re supposed to do.

This is really about finding a flow, a rhythm, that honors and is respectful of your sensitivity. Which means that you get to honor and respect your sensitivity. (Your sensitivity isn’t going away, right?)

Oh, and by the way…

There’s nothing wrong with you for being sensitive.

There’s nothing wrong with you if the only thing you can write today is a grocery list (and it’s OK if you don’t make it to the grocery store).

There’s nothing wrong with you if you can’t do that Facebook Live today or tomorrow.

There’s nothing wrong with you if you don’t want to manage a large group in a class because of your high level of empathy … and all the feels that go along with that.

You get to do this your way.

You’re not broken. My hope is that you begin to enter a relationship with your sensitivity. One that you can explore and see as an ally, instead of something that gets in your way of success, freedom, or just being like everyone else.

You weren’t born to be like anyone else. And you are beautiful, just the way you are.